Sufferlusher

-Before we proceed I must ask, are you entirely certain?
-Anything until the internet comes back
-Then you'll need 2½ c of wilted rose petal herbs, a small sharp knife , 1¼ vial of bloodclover, 6 candle holders and 6 black candles, a dove's tongue, 3 vials of ethereal oil, 5cm of your desired's hair, a feline familiar, a veil, red yawn, wooden spoon, a 5000ml brewing cauldron
-Any type of dove?
-Yes, any is fine, listen careful now
Be alone and shut the room pitch dark, place a table with the veil in the middle of the room, space the candles and the holders in a circle, set the yawn in the center and spin it so it weaves in between the candles in a spiderweb fashion (don't let yr familiar untangle it), this will serve as a spiritual connector as well as a tablecloth (dont burn the table!). But there's a catch, you must start the brew while listening to "Musette and Drums - Cocteau Twins" and complete it before the chorus, or else yr consciousness will forever fade into insanity!
-...fuck, I hate them
-Yeah, but it works, preheat the cauldron at 180c 20min, mix the ethereal oil w the bloodclove, stir the mix and add the following: dove's tongue, yr desired's hair, 2 drops of yr own blood (use the knife), rose petal herbs
Do this while chanting "selfish heart, oh red from rubble, flirt this heart w cauldron bubbles", if done correctly the petals will revert to a fiery tone, remove from fire and let it sit for 30min before pouring it, thats it!
-Mm, let me think about it ok?